


Carmesim

by Tia_Maria



Category: Villainous (Cartoon)
Genre: 1980ish, AU, Alternative Uniserve, Cannibal!Flug, Cannibalism, Dr. Flug knows how to cook, Faking a story, Gay, Human meat recipes, I Don't Even Know, Jail, Kissing, Lying to the Police, M/M, Not Beta Read, Playing Pretend, Police, Serial Killer, Serial Killer!Black Hat, Why Did I Write This?, homoerotic, i wrote this mildly drunk, murders, shortfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-13
Updated: 2019-07-13
Packaged: 2020-06-27 07:21:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19785994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tia_Maria/pseuds/Tia_Maria
Summary: Black Hat is a high-class serial killer, and Flug is the skilled guy on clean duty. So, of course, his number was one of the first on that man's speed-dial list.Seriously, It was doomed to happen eventually.After all, the police wouldn’t think twice on interrogating him once they finally caught the dark-skinned man.Black Hat is lucky Flug is much more than just a meticulous guy that cleans his bloody scenes.





	Carmesim

**Author's Note:**

  * For [My wine! 🍷❤](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=My+wine%21+%F0%9F%8D%B7%E2%9D%A4).



> I have literally 4 other fanfics that I already wrote and was supposed to upload today, but then I kept writing a bit more of this story and --  
> Oh-oh.

"What's your name?"

"Kenning Flug."

"Age?"

"31"

"Job?"

"...”

The place had this dim weak light, barely illuminating the people inside it. Which were basically the cop - Hartman J. Adams - and the suspect of cooperating with the infamous Black Hat.

And also one of the main people he keeps in touch with - for some reason the officer had yet to discover.

It was a matter of time for them to get to the bottom of this interrogation.

The suspect - Mr. Kenning Flug - was slim, white, had dirty blond hair and a tired face of a person that already knew it was doomed to happen someday but still preferred it could be after his morning cup of a coffee.

It was 6 in the morning, and Flug couldn’t even catch a nap the night before given a few _warrants_.

He opened his mouth and - when the cop raised his hand over the papers to scribe down the answer - instead of a reply, the man yawned.

“Sorry.” He apologized, scratching at his unshaved cheeks. “I’m a janitor.”

Then the answer, matter-of-factly. 

It was true. He worked as a janitor for a while.

“Where?” The cop pressed the question, frowning at the man’s attitude.

“One year at the medical institute of cardiovascular research of Michdaña.” He said, then, he kept going as the cop wrote down the words. “Two years at the science building of West High and another two years at the technology development department of U.S.H.L.” He said, easily.

Once the cop was almost finishing, he continued.

“ _Then_ ,” The cop arched an eyebrow at him, and Flug only grinned back. “Five and a half years at a cattle and beef industry in a big company in Central America that closed a few months ago.” He said.

The cop hummed, putting the pencil down at the paper and crossing his arms.

“And you had any other role in this industry?”

Flug shook his head, but his grin remained.

“No, sir.” He said, just as easily and truthful. “Just as Janitor.”

The cop frowned and groaned, still suspecting something.

“So you have no experience in dilacerating and gutting a living being?”

Flug shrugged.

“I have experience in cleaning their mess, not doing their job.”

The cop didn’t seem to understand the second meaning behind it, furthermore, at that, there were nothing he could actually use against that man in front of him - so, first, he had to drag more pieces of information outta the man.

He thought It was going to be easy. One was already caught and handcuffed. The accomplice (in front of him) was barely keeping the silent treatment.

If everything goes as planned, and he gets to unmask both, he could even go home earlier.

“Alright, _Flug_.” He said, getting comfortable on his chair, as he was letting his chair support his back. He stared at the man’s eyes and asked. “What about your relationship with Mr. Black Hat?”

Flug hummed, head slightly inclined to the left.

“Well…” He started, seeming quite uncomfortable. “It’s a bit _confusing_ , if I’m honest, officer.” He confessed, uneasy. Looking behind him as the tinted dark windows where probably three other cops were watching them. An almost imperceptible blush rising to his cheeks and a hand reached his lips. Shyly, he continued, whispering. “I guess he wants to date, but I’m fine with the fuck-buddy thing, you know…”

He cop faked an embarrassed caught and stood from his position, elbows in the table, trying to clarify the question.

“Mr. Flug, you don’t have to expose your intimate relationship with Mr. Black Hat.” The cop said, explaining. “The question was regards your... relation with that man’s supposed _assassination_.”

Flug opened his mouth in an understanding way and nod his head.

“Right. Yeah.” He said, faking ignorance. “But I’m not sure he really _did_ all those things, you see--” Flug sit closer to the edge of the chair and pressed his body over the table so he could whisper in a way only the cop could understand. “He’s not really all that mad and _sado_ as he usually seems like.” He smiled fondly, as if remembering a few memories. “He likes to snuggle and spoon after the sex!” As the cop raised a hand to interrupt him again, Flug concluded. “We never bondage-play because he cries every time he thinks he’s hurting me!” The grin on his lips was too widened, and he couldn’t hold another laugh in.

“ _Stop_.” The cop groaned, serious. Tired of the subject.

He wasn’t a beginner, he could guess that man was _probably_ making all that up!

“What is your _involvement_ with the _case_?” He tried again, eyes completely serious, he still had to try a lot more.

Flug breath in and rested his head on a hand, humming, thinking on the answer.

He couldn’t just tell them he was chopping and skinning a body, crushing their bones and grinding their meat to save a few for later lunches, and to bury the uneatable parts in the cemetery with the remaining closes and disposable tissues he used to clean the blood afterward, while Black Hat was being taken by the police.

So he answers the first thing that came to his mind instead.

“I was cooking dinner when he called me.” He said. “Telling me to wait so we could eat together.” It wasn’t a total lie. He _was_ fixing dinner. _His_ unusual kind of dinner...

The office grinned at him.

“And what were you cooking?”

“ _Spaghetti_.” He answered, defying the man to call him a liar.

He was, yeah. But he was a pro in getting out of situations like that. He only had to keep faking the story.

“Oh, really?”

Flug only kept the simple smile on his face.

“If I ask that _criminal_ about that night,” The police officer said, talking about Black Hat. He was crossing his arms on the table, staring at Flug as challenging as a pro could be. “I wonder if he would tell me these exact words.”

Flug’s smile did not lessen nor did it fade. It, instead, _grew_.

“I can certainly say he would _indeed_.” The man replied, and, inside his eyes, the thin madness vibe was shining.

The police office new he should be careful. It was his case. He was the only one that made the connection between them both and the founded bodies - if he failed in believing on his beliefs for one single second. It could mean they all would have to start the investigation from the beginning.

No one wanted that.

“You are really confident about that.” The grizzly officer said, frowning but grinning. “ _Alright_.”

And just like that, he clapped his hands twice and the door opened.

Flug new the squeal he did suddenly was unnecessary - but it was his own instincts yelling for him to keep calm. It wasn’t every day that Black Hat appeared in front of him with his white social shirt opened, exposing that well-built chest, and, especially, _hand-cuffed_.

“Oh my…” Flug faked surprise, putting a hand on his chest.

Yeah, he was getting a lot more nervous than previously.

He was _teasing_ about the whole sex-buddy deal. Of _course_ he was. He was just the clean duty guy that gets a really good amount of bills as payment for his neatly done job and a very big basket of goods every Christmas - with a marvelous wine Flug got used to drinking a glass of, especially every time he concludes another duty (as if toasting their plan) and while eating the cooked flesh of one of Black Hat’s victims. 

He also took a liking on keeping the empty bottles near his fireplace like they were a treasured gift from the man to him.

He can’t deny he desired to be in that man’s bed more than once.

And he can’t deny he had dreamed about having more than just that.

He _is_ a lonely, mad and cannibal gay guy.

Black Hat stared at the officer once he entered the room, then, he sent Flug another kind of stare. It wasn’t anger, nor annoyance. It was more... _apprehensiveness_.

Flug nodded his head in reply, sending another serious look back at the criminal and stook from his chair, sounding worried.

“These are completely unnecessary!” Flug shouted at the officer, pointing at the handcuffs.

The policeman arched an eyebrow and demanded Flug to sit back on his chair. Once both of the suspects were sitting in front of him, he crossed his arms.

“Mr. Black Hat,” He called the man, seeing the man staring at him from under the brim of his top hat. “could you please tell us the motive that took you to call Mr. Flug yesterday’s evening?”

The dark-skinned man frowned and glanced at Flug besides him.

“I...” He started, feeling Flug’s sneakers rub at his expensive shoes. He felt Flug’s body expression show worriedness at him. But he knew it was fake. It meant the guy was giving him tips of what should he say. “I called him--” Before he finished his sentence, he saw Flug rubbing a lot at his ring finger. _Oh_. Oh gosh... “because we are dating.”

It sounded really weird to hear the words coming from the dark-skinned criminal.

The police officer frowned at him. Actually surprised that he said it.

Flug inclined his body over the table and arched an eyebrow at him, whispered at the office a small quiet “ _did you see?_ ”.

“Right…” He said. “And for what reason did you call him? What did you two talk about?”

It was obvious he was defying them to get completely different stories so the policeman could put _both_ in jail.

Black Hat groaned.

Flug scratched at his belly, and inclined his body in, like he was feeling a slight pain in there.

“Dinner.” He said. “We were talking about dinner.”

The younger one almost made a victory gesture.

“Hnf.” The officer raised from his chair and looked at him from above. “And _what was he cooking_?”

The question was made to be difficult, to not be as easy as the other ones. The policeman grinned mischievously at them.

Flug swallowed cold, not knowing how to express the word… He almost started to panic once Black Hat took too long to answer.

But, then, it finally came.

“...Meatballs.”

Close enough.

They looked at each other and Flug started to laugh.

“ _Yeah_.” He said, cleaning a few tears of amusement from the corners of his eyes. “I do put lots of it, don’t I?” Then he laughed again.

It was funny because he _does like_ to cook meatballs with young girls flesh, and, curiously, Black Hat’s last victim was just right for the recipe.

How the man knew that was _beyond_ Flug. But the murderer also tried to suppress a laugh at the younger’s intern joke.

A tired sigh took place over the funny noise, and the policeman groaned in displease.

“ _Ok_ , so you two arranged this pretty well.” He said, not at all amused. “But I’m tired of listening to this fake story.”

Black Hat frowned and mumbled a curse.

Flug tried to look composed and replied.

“We are not faking!”

The policeman punched the table and shouted.

“Then prove it!” His loud voice took both out of surprise. “Prove that this is _not_ a fake story - because if you don’t convince **me** , then _you two_ -” He pointed firmly, seriously, at them both “-are going to **jail**!”

They glanced at each other, clearly taken back.

Their story goes _way_ back. Black Hat was the one to maintain contact with Flug. He’d just recently came back from Central-America and was getting hired by a _butchery_ near the serial killer’s house. Flug was working late cleaning the place, and at that night, he saw a really drunk lady walking on the streets alone and staggering - completely intoxicated - into a dark alley. He was really in need of fresh meat to stock into his kitchen, so he took one of his boss’ cleaver and went after her. Unfortunately, Black Hat chased her first, cutting her throat out as his vests were drenching in her vivid warm blood.

It was… really beautiful to see. Flug is ashamed to say he fell into this weird crush he has on the man right after the first sigh of him killing someone.

Of course, Black Hat tried to chase and kill _him_ thinking he’d call the cops - but Flug surprised the man when he just asked, in a malicious and flirty voice _‘ if I clean... can I keep the meat?_ ’

Their “relationship” begun after that. He gave Black Hat his number in case he wanted to go for dinner - But the killer called him instead to ask if he’d like to keep another of his corpses. It was obvious the man hated to deal with the disposal of them. And, honestly, Flug would be more than happy to keep them in his stomach, thank you very much.

So… Yeah. Most of the times Black Hat would just kill anyone he wanted, but sometimes he’d kill a few people that matched Flug’s taste (he has one, ok?) - and, when it happens, Flug would mindlessly call him his own particular meal provider. 

Of _course_ we’d clean the scene and get paid for it as well (this job needs special cleaning equipment and products that only _he_ knows where and how to buy it under everyone’s nose!)

As they exchanged glanced, Flug could feel how uncomfortable and angered at the police Black Hat seemed.

“You _see_ , Officer. It’s hard to keep a relationship like ours a secret in society-- The world still hates gay couples...” Flug tried to argue. He seemed sad and uneasy. “We’re still quite _shy_ about this whole PDA thing…”

The police crossed his arms and stared firmly at them one more time - _menanceingfully_.

So, scared of going to jail, the younger man did what everybody would do in his position.

He tried to look convincing and, non-challenging, he _sat on Black Hat’s lap_.

Didn’t the office want a _public display of affection_?

He is going to get a _public display of affection_!

Flug sat on the serial killer’s lap and sent him an unamused face, although it was clear that he was blushing.

“Sorry, darling.” He said, throwing an arm over the other man’s shoulder and getting comfortable on the man’s chest. Lining. Caressing the side of the man’s dark face with the tip of his nose and resting his head on the man’s clavicle a moment later.

It helped that Black Hat was taller than him.

That was… a really nice position.

He sent the office a look from over his shoulder and didn’t notice any trace of that his persuasion worked, so he continued.

Black Hat was completely static. His hands were tied because of the handcuff and Flug could swear the black man’s cheeks were slightly flushed as well.

The janitor intertwined his fingers in the back of the killer's nape and caressed his face with both of his thumbs. He approached the man’s lips with his own and, a second before he kissed him, he mouthed a quickly ‘ _be convincing._ ’

He kissed the cold lips of Black Hat slowly, at first - to taste and make it somehow look like romantic. He inclined his head. His full lips wrapped both sides of the black guy’s mouth and sucked with desire - making a point of causing loud sounds when releasing it. He moaned, then, he dove again. He bit Black Hat’s bottom lips between his and waved his body, pulling the man’s head closer to him. He seemed to ignite some kind of instinctive attitude out of the serial killer, who started - _finally_ \- to reciprocate.

His hands had enough gap between the handcuffs that he could palm at Flug’s slim waist. His fingers went up, slowly, tracing the man’s shape until he reached the end of his ribs. He placed his fingertips in a way it wouldn’t be obvious to those who were watching - but Flug could _feel_ the pressure Black Hat was applying in his skin, while carefully feeling his _bones_ there. 

It was way less freaky than it sounded - he was just… caressing his intern structure.

Flug let another moan out, again, when he heard and felt a _groan_ coming from the other man, while he was deliciously sucking at his bottom lip.

The office coughed in a fist and demanded them to _stop_.

The janitor stared at Black Hat’s eyes for a second before ending their kiss with another wet noise and saw the man stare back at him - half lid in a defiant way.

Flug wanted to stay and challenge the killer _back_. 

For whatever was the bet - he would _double the price_.

But they still had to find a way to _go home_.

After getting off the man’s lap, he left a hand still placed on the dark face and sat back at his chair, besides the murderer - Flug licked his lips in a luxurious way (which was seen by both the police and suspect) and caressed one last time Black Hat’s cheeks before letting go of him.

“I have no idea how, but, yeah, okay - you two are dating, whatever.” The officer waved a hand around, rolling his eyes, indignant. “It doesn’t convince me that you two are _not_ involved in the murder of Christina Buckman.”

Flug arched an eyebrow at the officer.

“I was at my house yesterday night - how am _I_ involved in this?!” He asked offended.

Black Hat frowned at him.

“Are you trying to accuse _me_?!” His voice was yet as deep, rough and sexy as Flug remembered.

The janitor sighed, sending him a look.

“I was cooking dinner, I have no idea what _you_ were doing that night!”

“I was--” The serial killer started, then, his face flushed deeply, and he mumbled. “I was looking for a _present_.”

Flug’s mouth opened and he gaped for a few seconds.

Oh... That’s _cute_. 

Not at all what he thought Black Hat would come up with, but, yeah, he can work with it too.

“... _Darling_.” He raised a hand to his chest and blushed.

The blush was much easier to do giving his surprise at the sudden subject.

“It took me a while to look for a proper one.” Black Hat shrugged a shoulder, averting eye contact.

Flug smiled at him.

The office was clearly confused. He was waving his hands around like he was honestly questioning his own reasons of interrogating those two homosexuals.

“ _No!_ ” He punched the table again, picking their attention back at the front. “We have a testimony that saw _you_ going into the same alley as Ms. Buckman the night of her murder!” The officer pointed at Black Hat, accusingly.

The dark man frowned and delayed a bit to respond.

Then, slowly, he opened his mouth and said.

“By chance…” He asked. “Is the testimony the hobo that leaves nearby?”

As the silence persisted for six more seconds, he raised an eyebrow at the office and complimented.

“Because that man is a _Nazi_ .” He groaned the following words, making them a lot convincing even to Flug. “He is fucking _racist_ and when I tried giving coins to him once, he threw it at me really hard.”

Flug did his best to hold the laugh in.

The policeman held his head in a hand and sighed loudly, he was completely perplexed and somehow _outraged_ at himself. How could he suspect of two innocent guys that love each other and was just trying to survive in the rough prejudiced _life_?

He was ashamed.

Flug was mesmerized.

Everything indeed ended fairly _smoother_ than he thought it would do.

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

Flug was skinning the torso of a man on his middle thirties when Black Hat called him. 

The man was killed less than a week ago, but Flug only had time to start preparing meals with his meat on Saturday - his weekly job at the Buckery was quite hectic. (At least he can use the industrial refrigerators to hide the bodies)

The ringtone for Black Hat’s calls was the less noisy he had - because it was special. And he didn’t want anyone to notice the number on his screen.

“Hi.”

He didn’t need to recognize himself or to say he knew who was calling. Black Hat usually would answer only with the location and what was the service he needed.

> _\- “Hi.”_

When his voice echoed a greeting on the other side of his phone, Flug knew something very surprising was going to happen.

> _\- “What’s for dinner?”_

The young one grinned at the torso in front of him.

“Roasted Breast with Herbs.” He answered, feeling his face flush.

> _\- “I’ll be there at eight.”_

That deep voice said.

“ _Great._ ” Flug’s full face split into a big grin of contentment. “Bring wine!”

**Author's Note:**

> This took a different path than I primarily designed but I’m not unsatisfied with it.


End file.
